


Makemashita

by jedusaur



Category: Hikaru no Go
Genre: Drunkenness, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2009-07-28
Updated: 2009-07-28
Packaged: 2017-10-22 02:52:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,280
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/232961
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jedusaur/pseuds/jedusaur
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The closest Ogata ever gets to the truth is when he's drunk enough to believe it.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Makemashita

Ogata is even more drunk than Hikaru realized, and he finishes off another beer as he places his next move. Hikaru tries not to feel bad for taking advantage of him when he's in this state. Ogata was the one who wanted to play Sai, and Hikaru can't let him do that under normal circumstances. The man did just win the Judan title, after all. He deserves to play Sai, even if he doesn't know he's doing it.

16-4 Kosumi. Hikaru is so used to hearing Sai's even voice commanding his hand that it takes him a moment to realize that Sai didn't speak aloud, only pointed with his fan. Sai has been acting odd lately, always wanting attention and talking about how little time he has left. Hikaru rolls his eyes. The ghost has managed to hold out for a millennium so far; he doubts anything is going to happen now.

Sai really didn't even have to point with the fan. Hikaru isn't as good as he is yet, but he's getting good at predicting some of his moves. Good thing, too, thinks Hikaru wryly, because he wouldn't have beat Waya in the pro exam if he hadn't asked himself what Sai would do in his place. And if he'd lost to Waya, he would have had to beat Isumi for the third spot, which he wouldn't have been able to do. Hikaru has never won against Isumi in a fair game. Sai can be annoying sometimes, but Hikaru is glad that he's around.

Hikaru turns his thoughts back to the board in front of him. The lights are off so that Ogata's roommate can sleep, and the only thing illuminating the board is the moonbeams streaming in through the window, glinting off Ogata's glasses, making it impossible to tell what he's thinking. Hikaru guesses it's something along the lines of "more beer."

But if the inebriation has dulled Ogata's senses, it has also made him intriguingly honest. He wanted to bet on me, Hikaru thinks wonderingly. He thought I could win against Touya Meijin with no handicap besides a reverse komi of five and a half moku. Of course, that game was played with an invisible fifteen-moku handicap against him, and it was played by Sai, but Ogata didn't know that.

Ogata is concentrating much harder on the game than he was a few minutes ago. Hikaru has been placing stones automatically wherever the fan points, without paying much attention. Now he looks down. It doesn't take him long to read to the end. "I win," he says. "This is over." He grabs a handful of stones and starts putting them back in his goke.

"W-wait!" Ogata says, his gaze fixed on the board.

Crap, thinks Hikaru. I hope he's not sober enough to make trouble out of this later. "You messed up on an easy life-or-death problem. You must be really drunk, Ogata-sensei," he says teasingly.

"Forget about my mistake," says Ogata. Hikaru has already put most of the stones away, but he's still looking at the board as if the game is laid out in front of him. "You played in such a strange place on the top right, and threatened that large cluster of stones... my game fell apart..."

"I guess you had a little too much to drink." This hasn't done any good. Even completely wasted, a nine-dan with a title should have crushed Hikaru, a new first-dan. Ogata knows that. Hikaru finishes cleaning up the board quickly and stands up. "Good night!" he says and hurries to the door of the hotel room.

"Such solid play," Ogata mumbles from behind him. "It was as if I were playing... Sai..."

Hikaru stops in his tracks. Ogata recognizes Sai's playing style? From watching that one internet game with Touya Meijin?

"Ridiculous," murmurs Ogata. "I must be really drunk."

Hikaru heaves a sigh of relief and steps out of the room, but he doesn't even get halfway down the hall before the door opens again and Ogata leans out. "Shindou!"

Hikaru turns around slowly. It's pitch black in the hall, and he can't see anything. "Shindou-kun," says Ogata, and his voice is gentler. "Come back."

This is a bad idea, but Hikaru obeys. They walk back to the window so they can see each other, and Ogata fixes Hikaru with a long stare. Finally, he says, "You're Sai."

"I... what? No, I'm not." Ogata is standing uncomfortably close to him.

"You are." The alcohol lends certainty to the accusation. "You've been holding back all along. At the tournament, and as an Insei, and in the pro examinations, you were not using your real strength. I know what you can do, Shindou." He reaches around Hikaru, his arm encircling his waist, and flips open the two goke. His hand moves quickly and surely, setting out stones in the corner of the board. "What does black do here? How does he survive?"

Hikaru tries to ignore the physical contact and focus on the tsumego. He picks up a black stone and sets it down gingerly. "Here?"

Ogata grabs his shoulder and roughly spins him around until they're facing each other, noses inches apart. "Yes! Do you remember that formation, Shindou? Do you remember seeing it at a children's tournament years ago? You called out the answer and ruined the game, and that was what first caught my interest about you. The Shindou Hikaru who played Touya Akira in that junior high tournament would not have seen that move, and the Shindou Hikaru who became an Insei would not have seen that move, but there is something else in you. Something... deeper. A skill you call upon only occasionally."

Hikaru is pressed up against the table, the corner of the goban digging into the small of his back. He almost loses his balance, and reaches back with one hand to support himself. He fingers land in a goke. The sudden sound of the stones rattling around startles Ogata into silence, and in the moment of quiet, the sleeping roommate shifts and groans softly.

Ogata rests a hand on Hikaru's arm and slowly, cautiously, slides it down his sleeve and into the goke, his fingers brushing against Hikaru's. In a barely-audible whisper, he says, "I don't know why you hide your power, Shindou, but... thank you for letting me see it tonight. Thank you for letting me play against Sai."

Over his shoulder, at the edge of the darkness, Hikaru can see Sai's glowing silhouette. Then the ghost retreats into a shadowy corner of the room, and Hikaru can see nothing but Ogata.

***

Early the next morning, Hikaru takes a train back home. Sai doesn't say a word until they get to Hikaru's room, when he demands a game. Hikaru wants nothing more than to sleep, but something in the desperation of Sai's voice makes him give in. Fourteen moves into the game, he nods off, and when he looks up...

For the rest of his life, that last night haunts Hikaru's thoughts. If only he had spent it with Sai instead. If only he had gone to sleep earlier, so he would have been awake to finish that final game. If only he had listened when Sai told him, with ever-increasing hysteria, that his time was running out.

Four years later, Hikaru works his way up through the preliminaries and faces Ogata in the five-match challenge for the Judan title. He can see in Ogata's expression the question: will this be a game between Ogata and Shindou, or between Ogata and Sai?

Hikaru meets his gaze with an unspoken question of his own: can you tell the difference?

 _"Onegaishimasu."_   



End file.
